Monday, September 10, 2012

Our first son.

It's crazy to think that our darling Sweet Potato has officially lived with someone else longer than he has lived with us.  It's been a year since we said goodbye to our son and I still miss him like crazy.  We live very close to the home he's in now and I'm always nervous I will see them at the store, or the doctors, or the park.  It's a constant fear that I am moments away from a nervous breakdown.  It's bad, seriously.  It would be a totally different story if I knew he was in a good home.  But every time I see the back of a little blonde boys head, my heart stops and I wonder if it's my son.  It's the hardest thing ever.  His new mom lied to the courts and said we had a great relationship and that they would keep in contact with us, but boy did they manipulate the system.  I hate going grocery shopping for fear that I will see them in the isle and stop what I'm doing and run out crying.  I wish I had peace with the situation.   I miss you so much Sweet Potato, I hope you are well and I hope you know how much we love you and we always will. 

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